The Rowling
The Rowling
(with apologies to Edgar Allan Poe)
Once upon an evening weary, as my eyes grew red and bleary,
Surfing ‘cross the net for news, an awful, tedious, dreadful chore
Suddenly there came a pinging—an alarum gently ringing
Some neglected RSS feed that I’d never checked before
So, in drowsy boredom drooping, idly I went a-snooping
Snooping for some hopeful fragment of intriguing, novel lore
Clicked the link—t’was Pottermore!
There, a gentle, smiling image
J.K. Rowling’s placid visage
Greeted me with promises of wonders I’d ne’er seen before
Interactive new adventures, hints at innovative ventures
E-books, fanfic, member forums, beta testing, focus quorums
Secrets never shared by Harry, Voldemort, or Dumbledore
Coming soon to Pottermore
In a daze, I scanned the website
Watching origami ow-ls take flight
Flying over magic tomes with letters peeling by the score
How, I pondered, can she do this?
Is she mad, or merely clueless?
Self-publishing? A peddler in some thinly-veiled online store
By the name of Pottermore?
Still, despite my frantic raving
Spittle flying, arms a-waving
Shattering the peace that reigned within my private office door
Shouting, “Is this merely madness?
Is there any hope of gladness
Bringing to self-publishing a luster it’s not known before?”
Still she murmured, “Pottermore”
No more publishers or agents
Editors or drones to rage at
Maybe she could skip the middleman and make a buck or four
So, I gazed upon the image
Mused upon the peaceful visage
Of that author who had found success so many times before
Calmly pitching Pottermore
It may be the tide is turning
Protocols are ripe for burning
Burning that will make us wonder what the future has in store
Will status quo return again?
Or literary chaos reign?
Perhaps, a brand-new paradigm that shakes us to our very core
Heralded by Pottermore
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This cracks me up! Pure brilliance!
I don’t write poetry and I typically don’t enjoy it but Poe’s The Raven is one of the few I do enjoy. Your parody is exceptional. Well done, Fred!
Very clever, Fred. Here I’d thought to do an article about Pottermore. So glad I didn’t. Your humor was much more fitting.
But I wonder, do you really think Pottermore will have an effect on publishing? I mean, I sort of thought, what works for J. K. Rowling works because she is J. K. Rowling.
Becky
Becky, I would still love to see an article on Pottermore from you, especially as relates to self-publishing.
And as always, Fred, super job!
Oh, please do write the article Becky. My goofing doesn’t begin to address the deeper issues here. I don’t think it’s such a revolutionary move on the surface–we’ve had self-publishing and interactive writing communities for years–but I think the psychological impact could be huge.
1. Self-publishing has been the crazy aunt in the attic for a long time now. If a name author has the confidence to run off and start creating her own e-books and self-publishing new material, it’s going to inspire other people to follow her example. Granted, J.K. Rowling has huge resources at her disposal, but it’s the principle of the thing. Self-publishing increasingly becomes the province of savvy, talented authors, and derisive labels like “vanity press” lose their power. It also brings the artist closer to their audience.
2. Traditional publishing houses demand authors bring with them an established “platform” of dedicated fans who they know will buy their books. Rowling may demonstrate that if you’ve got the platform, modern technology enables you to dispense with the publishing house and pocket all that money that used to go to intermediaries. If you’re a publisher, this must be terrifying. What will they do when more big-name authors decide to bolt from the system? How will they attract new celebrity authors?
Interesting….very interesting
I love your parody, Fred! I don’t get to drop by here much anymore, but that was great!
Becky, you really SHOULD write that article! Now we’re all curious and ready to eat it up–
Sharing the link to this at http://facebook.com/ms.contraryartist! I hope you won’t mind!