The Geek’s Guide to Surviving the Holidays

A practical guide for sci-fi and fantasy fans who want to survive the holidays.
on Nov 28, 2017 · No comments

Tis the season…for holiday craziness. The month between Thanksgiving and New Year’s is more hectic than Hobbiton preparing for a Baggins birthday party.

With all the places to go, things to do, people to see, Christmas songs to listen to, how can we survive? It’s simple, really.

Geek style.

The Geek’s Guide to Surviving the Holidays

A practical guide for sci-fi and fantasy fans who want to survive the holidays.

Mingle all the Christmas movies with your favorite geek films. Think bingeing Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, all the Marvel or DC productions.

Watch The Last Jedi—like five times. And revisit the rest of the saga while you’re at it.

Count down the days to the Doctor Who Christmas special on your calendar.

Wanting to avoid traveling? Invest in a TARDIS. It’s the only way to get around. May also come in handy when you run out of time to do some last-minute shopping.

Fill your Christmas wish list with delightful geek gifts.

Come up with fabulous New Year’s resolutions, such as…

  • Learn Klingon.
  • Memorize every poem in Lord of the Rings.
  • Take archery lessons so you could outdo Katniss, Susan Pevensie, and Legolas in a competition.

Create stories where a dwarf is Santa and all his helpers are Lothlorien elves. Sell them and make thousands of dollars because #comedy.

Give the gift of geekery: replica weapons from Middle-earth, a Harry Potter wand, the DVD set of the most recent Doctor Who season.

Make barrels and barrels of butterbeer. It’s an excellent substitution for champagne. May also be good for spiking eggnog.

When scrambling through the malls and stores, channel your inner Gandalf and shout, “You shall not pass!” Foolproof method for making room for yourself.

Books. Buy lots and lots of books.

Whip up some clever Captain America Christmas memes.

Instead of spending late nights wrapping presents, use that time to debate conspiracy theories with your friends.  And hire Orlando Bloom to take care of your presents.

Watch Die Hard and wonder why on earth that counts in this list.

Before you venture into the shopping chaos, declare, “I’m off on an adventure!” And make sure you’re well-equipped to survive the journey.

Instead of hanging a stocking, use a Chewbacca onesie—it’s bigger and can hold way more presents.

Spend Friday nights immersed in the world of S.H.I.E.L.D.

Make a special holiday calendar, with each month featuring a different dwarf decked out in a glitterbeard.

Buy Doctor Who themed wrapping paper for your gifts.

Use a lightsaber to open all your presents on Christmas morning.

Write an essay on how Santa’s reindeer, given their capacity to fly, must belong in Narnia.

Make a naughty and nice list of characters from superhero movies.

Guess who’s on the naughty list…. image via

Write Christmas cards to your favorite sci-fi and fantasy movie actors.

When it snows, build a snow fort and reenact the battle for Helm’s Deep.

What are some other ideas for geeks to survive the holidays?

Zachary Totah writes speculative fiction stories. This allows him to roam through his imagination, where he has illegal amounts of fun creating worlds and characters to populate them. When not working on stories or wading through schoolwork, he enjoys playing sports, hanging out with his family and friends, watching movies, and reading. He lives in Colorado and doesn't drink coffee. He loves connecting with other readers and writers. Find him on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Google Plus, Goodreads, and at his website.

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